Episode 5

When I decided it was time to start offering energy healings as a service I was very unsure of myself. I didn’t know which web hosting service to go with, how to set a price, where to advertise, etc. I felt a little overwhelmed with it I think. I have been a business owner in the past and was successful at it so I know I can do it. My biggest challenge in my mind is that I’m offering services remotely so it’s not like when I had the salon and people could google salons near me and find us. I sat with it, meditated with myself and did some meditations with my higher self. The first answer I got was all you need to do is build a website. Ok, I can do that pretty easily, so I built this website and I set an intention that it would easily and effortlessly reach the people I’m meant to help and that are aligned with my energy. Then I thought; I built it, now what.

At this point it may be important to take you back to the beginning of my spiritual journey when all I knew was I needed my life to change and I didn’t know how to do it. I was doing a lot of energy work and guided meditations, learning how to meditate and connect with my higher self/intuition. I had bought tarot cards but I didn’t really know how to do readings with them yet. It was during one of these meditations that I asked what my purpose here is and the answer I got was ascension. It didn’t make a lot of sense to me at the time but I was just in the beginning of the journey so I was like ok I’ll see where this goes. I had read or maybe watched a reel at some point that gave me the idea to connect with myself and ask the question- what am I supposed to be learning or what is the lesson here when things weren’t going as I’d like them to be going or if I didn’t understand what was happening in my life. I tell you this friends, to tell you that literally every single time I asked this question, the answer was PATIENCE. I was vexed. Patience? I’m trying to start a whole new and exciting life here and you ask me to be patient?? Also, how is patience an answer to the things I have going on? How is patience guidance? I decided that since I was not at a point in my life that things had been going exactly wonderful for me to try to be patient and see where it went. It has been a wild ride ever since with a lot of ups and downs but as they say, healing is not linear. It’s a spiral so even my dips down are still spiraling me up. It’s extremely difficult to see that in the moments of downs sometimes but hindsight and all really does prove the point. I learned how to ask my spirit guides/angels for specific signs when I was really stuck to make a decision and that helped me a lot too. Even if sometimes the answer was not the one I preferred to hear, I followed it. I figured I hadn’t been doing the most amazing job making my own decisions so I would try it this way and see what happens. Why not right? I’m here to learn, grow, evolve and expand so let’s follow the guidance and see where it leads.

All right, so here I am now, I’ve made a website and nothing happened. What to do now? I meditated on this again and the answer I got was “let it happen organically” Now sometimes when I meditate, I second guess myself because I wonder if I’m just talking to myself and making stuff up. I imagine most people probably feel this way from time to time but I guess I haven’t asked many people about it. To be fair, I don’t really know many people that meditate so I don’t know who I would even ask. There have been several instances however that I know I’m definitely receiving guidance or information from the field around me and not just talking back and forth to myself, this being one of those instances. I would never, in a million years give myself the advice to “let it happen organically” when I’m trying to get started in a new business. I can’t imagine giving anyone that sort of advice honestly. I’m like you need to advertise, put yourself out there, make it known that you’re open and available for appointments! I did not take the advice of letting it happen organically. I set out to make a Facebook business page. Turns out Facebook decided I’m not a real person and refused me a business page for my business… Very curious development. I then decided to make a google business page… which google would not let me verify. Another very curious development. I tried to get my digital products advertised on google to bring people to my page and google accused me of misleading or misinformation or something along those lines and denied me again! I sat with this for a little while and connected with my higher self to get some answers. My higher self told me my job was to raise my vibration right now. Sing, dance, paint, play the piano, do the things that bring me joy.

Now as someone who is a doer, but maybe a little blinded to this fact, I again was vexed. How am I supposed to get this business up and running? How am I supposed to get clients to book if I’m not actively doing anything to advertise myself? Of course, I know intellectually that I’m not supposed to worry about the how. I’m supposed to build the website and let it happen organically. The how is up to God/Universe/Source. I, as a doer, have not learned how to do this. I believe this is one of my Big Lessons. I am in the process now of learning how to hold the frequency despite the outer circumstances. Hold the frequency before it shows up in my reality. Trust, faith and belief that it’s already mine. I was reading the book “Living In The Light” by Shakti Gawain and in the chapter “Balancing Being and Doing” she talks about the importance of balancing these very important energies. She says most of us identify more with one type of these energies, either being or doing, and disown the other. Until I read this I don’t think I would have necessarily categorized myself as doer which in her terms is a Type A. I always thought of myself as more of a Type B, go with the flow personality. The way she explains it in her book makes sense to me as to who I am as a person. I am good at expressing my outgoing energy, I do have trouble receiving, I do not like feeling vulnerable and doing nothing has been one of the most difficult things for me. She says if you’re primarily a doer, your intuition will almost always lead you in the direction of doing less. This sentence in this chapter of her book is what really hit home for me and gave me sort of an aha moment- “The hardest thing for a doer is getting no message at all, having to hang out and wait and ‘do nothing’ until further guidance comes.” Woah. Friends, there is no greater truth ever spoken to me in my life at this particular moment in time and this is where I’m at. Every night before I go to sleep I have a specific ritual I speak asking for guidance or to work through certain things in my sleep time. I have some pretty wild things going on in my sleep time sometimes! I don’t always remember what happens but when I do I will write things down. I had a period of time when I was waking up constantly with messages and trying to scribble them down in the middle of the night in the dark. There’s some stuff I can’t really read lol. Only one time do I recall waking up, going to pick up my pen and paper and very clearly hearing “you don’t need to write that down.” After that night I didn’t seem to wake up as much with messages in the middle of the night. Sometimes I wake up in the morning with a message and I try to write them down so I don’t forget. The one recently that has been sticking with me is that sometimes no sign is the sign. UGH!

I will leave you with this. Because of who I have been as a person, I set up a new business page on google for my business and once again, very curiously, my account has been suspended and not publicly visible for not following guidelines. I have run a google business account and a Facebook business page for many years as a salon owner. I do not have any answers for the trouble I’ve been having trying to advertise this business other than I’m not following my guidance and letting it happen organically. In the past with other things I’ve tried to do, I considered technical difficulties such as these “blocks” or redirections from my spirit team so I think the time has come for me to surrender and allow it to happen organically as I’ve been told from the beginning. I am learning, growing and evolving every day, and when I can be curious about the things happening in my life, I can continue to do so. For now, I’ll be here painting, singing, dancing and finding joy in my journey. Holding the frequency despite the outer circumstances and observing with curiosity and anticipation.

With so much love,

Katie

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